We’ve been so fortunate to get to know another waiting adoptive couple with our adoption agency. We met each other at the weekend intensive, where there were several other couples and singles learning about open adoption, birthmothers and match meetings, all of us overwhelmed and sleepless. My husband Scott and I immediately gravitated towards partners Heather and Holly when they joked that their kid will be known by others as the one covered in dog hair. We thought, Yes, our people! Our child might also, despite our best efforts, get lost amongst the tumbleweeds of dog hair in the summer. (Note: all of us are clean and tidy people as are our houses.) When Heather revealed owning a pet sitting business, our affection for them was solidified –Scott owns a woodworking business and he so respects those who, like him, are dedicated to running their own business. I think their genuine and laid back nature gelled well with our personalities. Later we found out that Heather knows no stranger, but at the time we felt special.
After going “live” 6 months later we kept waiting to see Heather and Holly’s profile go live, too, on our adoption agency’s website. Where were they? Finally we saw them! Yeah, they made it! It can be a lonesome experience going through the waiting to adopt time period and it was nice to find people who we wanted to be friends with who were experiencing the same. We’ve found that while we don’t live near enough to drop by for a laugh or a gripe more than every few months, they are just a Facebook message away.
We discussed what it would mean to be older parents. While having different infertility experiences, we were able to share them easily, knowing that there would be understanding. We talked about our nurseries and how they wouldn’t be Pottery Barn beautiful but charming and artistic and perfect for our families. We were able to discuss how strange and unnatural it felt for us to have our lives on display and photographing and writing about our lives continuously for our online presence. We talk about how hard the wait can be sometimes. But mostly, we laugh.
We also have discovered things about Heather and Holly that we admire. Holly has got an adventurous spirit, surviving one of those insane mud runs, and running 5ks, one in pink knee highs. You can tell she garners great respect from the kids that she counsels at her job as a school guidance counselor because of her youthful spirit and ability to listen. I’ve found Heather has an artistic eye and a gift for writing. She takes phenomenal photos of the pets that she sits, including always the perfect caption. They both stand up for causes they believe in and are active in their community. We so admire that. It’s obvious what wonderful things they will bring into their future child’s life: kindness, adventure, creativity, community, an awareness of the larger world, and great fun.
Scott and I are hoping that very soon an expectant mom will see how special Holly and Heather are. We hope that someday soon after we are lucky to be chosen too, we can all get together at each other’s houses and watch our children play together. And reminisce over each of our adoption journeys, which have along the way created this new friendship.
If you are interested in finding out more about this great couple, our friends Heather and Holly, please check out their adoption website: http/www.iHeartAdoption.org/users/hhadopt
(Here is a link to their fantastic blog where they write about us! http://hh-adopt.blogspot.com/2013/06/knowing-enough.html )
surviving the heat in NC!